Discovering or realizing you have a cheating partner can be one of the most devastating moments in your adult life. It can twist everything around and send you on a rollercoaster of emotions. Whether the affair is simply a one-night stand or has gone on for years, the betrayal can ensure your relationship is never the same. Fortunately, there are some effective tips for coping with a cheating partner so you can move on towards happier and healthier horizons.
Accept and Own Your Feelings
Shock, rage, fear, devastation, grief, regret, and depression are all normal feelings associated with romantic betrayal. You may feel compelled to fight those off, swallow the pain, and avoid those feelings. But that’s a bad call. Ignoring the initial pain actually tends to just bottle up those emotions and cause an eruption later… and usually at the worst possible time. So let those feelings in so they can weaken over time.
Don’t Play the Blame Game or Seek Revenge
It’s normal to want to get back or even. But blaming yourself, your partner, or someone outside of the relationship won’t change what happened; neither will lashing out or enacting revenge. Talking trash to friends and family, airing your dirty laundry on social media, contacting your partner’s employer, or getting the other person in trouble might feel good at first. But those actions can snowball and cause a lot of unnecessary problems that will just make you feel worse about yourself and take longer to heal.
Don’t Bring the Kids Into It
According to statistics, one-third of all marriages (or 36.6%) result in divorce. And approximately one in two kids nationwide ends up living with one biological parent. Regardless of whether you’re married or simply in a long-term relationship, joint parenting options are available for those willing to put the needs of their children first. Your kids don’t need the stress and anguish of living in a household where their parents have grown apart. But they also don’t need to be in the middle of the disrespect. So keep the kids out of it.
Take Care of Yourself
Physical illness and issues can occur after the shock of infidelity and betrayal set in. These issues can include nausea, depression, intense fatigue or insomnia, weight loss, weight gain, overeating or lack of appetite, concentration issues, and mood bursts just to name a few. Experiencing any or all of those doesn’t mean you’re crazy. It does, however, mean you need to take care of yourself. Implement a better diet and fitness plan, stick to a sleep schedule, stay hydrated, and plan some adventures.
Bring In the Pros
Consider when to hire a private investigator and be sure to do so before jumping the gun and leaving your established home or long-term relationship. Their entire purpose is to find you the truth, whatever that is. And it may be quite different from what you’ve convinced yourself or been led to believe. However, if your worst fears do come to fruition, there’s still no reason to go it alone. The right counselor or therapist can help you get a handle on your feelings so you can make an easier path to your future. When you’re ready to move forward, give us a call and we’ll help you cope.